:: Horror Nightmares ::

That nite, mase tu hujan lebat sgt.. ngan kilatnya la... Yg tinggal kat umah tu cuma mak aku n aku.. ayah aku gi ceramah agama kat masjid.. ayah aku aderla gak ajak mak aku gi ceramah.. tp mase tu mak aku tak gi..sakit kaki katanya.. takdela aku rase seram sowang2... Leh kurang dlm kul 10 mlm camtu.. ujan pun dah berenti.. mlm tu jd sunyi je... ayah aku pun blom balik lagi.. Mase aku tgh syok2 baca suratkabo dgn mak aku tgh duduk menyandar kat kerusi ngan mata terlelap.. Ntah camne aku rase cam terdengar bunyi org ketuk pintu...tuk tuk tuk... tiga kali bunyi.. slow je ketuk.. aku toleh la pintu tu.. Eh ayah aku dah balik ek? tp nape tak dengar bunyi kete ayah aku? Aku biarkan jap dulu.. Kalo ayah aku ketuk pintu lagi.. Aku bukak la pintu tu.. Tapi pastu, tak dengar pun bunyi org ketuk pintu tu.. aku pun buat dek jela.. Mayb umah sebelah kot..

The Next Nite..
It was around 12 in the midnite.. i slept.. Ntah camne aku pun mimpi laaa...

First Nightmare...
Hmm.. mase tu i was hugging someone whom i noticed was a guy... really handsome n sweet guy...and i dunno why i felt flattered by his passion.. hehe... But then..ntah camne that guy suddenly hugged me very hard that i can't barely breath.. i was shocked. Nape laki ni tiba2 jadi ganaz peluk aku.. Tadi sweet jek! haa.. jgn pikir kotor tau! Bile aku tgk muka this guy, his face was totally changed from a handsome guy became horror face with his red eyes looking at me... Pelukan dia makin harder.. and aku dapat rasekan tangan 'dia' btul2 mencengkam blakang aku... Aku pun struggling very hard to free myself from him.. Ntah brape kali aku baca ayat kursi.. And sedar2 aku pun terbangun dari tidur.. dengan jantung berdegup2.. Pastu aku terdengar anjing menyalak kat luar.. fuuh... aku pun pandangla sekeliling bilik aku.. terasa seram la plak.. tp kerana ngantuk aku lagi strong dari seram.. aku pun sambungla tido..

Second Nightmare... Alamak datang lagi!!!
At first, it was really funny dream... sekor kucing antar emel kat aku.. hehe.. klakar la pulak..Dlm emel tu kate dia terkurung dlm satu umah tu..Umah tu berkunci.. Kucing tu mintak aku selamatkan dia.. Aku pun panggil la geng2 aku.. Geng2 sume jenis bukan manusia plak tu.. cam ala2 Pokemon tu.. hehe.. Camana la aku bole terkenan ngan Pokemon? Agaknya, ni la padahnya main cyber pet.. hahaha.. Ok sambung citer.. Dlm mimpi tu.. nampak cam Barney World je.. everything colourful... Ini nak pegi selamatkan kucing ni, bersemangat ke main.. Okla..Hari esoknya.. Aku pun dpt emel lg dari kucing tu.. Tajuk emel tu 'Bye'.. bye? nak ucap tq kat aku ke? Aku pun click la link tu.. Pastu aku nampak ade satu gambar a boy tgh baring di hospital, Sebelah kanan gambar tu was a girl tgh pandang dia.. nampak cam sedey jek! Pastu aku tgk la balik boy yg tgh baring tu.. Aku nak camkan saper dia tu.. Tapi aku tgk dia cam dah mati.. erkk!! aku tgk balik a girl yg sedey tu.. Tapi bukan a girl anymore.. Tapi seseorang yg duduk dilitupi kain putih.. And lepas tu aku cam dah sesak nafas apabila ade satu tgn (mcm pakai glove putih) cuba nak menekup muka aku.. Aduhai... Kena lagi!!! Aku pun struggling la utk kali kedua.. Lepas aku abis je baca ayat kursi.. Aku pun terjaga dari tidur.. Ni tak leh jadi ni.. Aku pun beralih tempat tidur.. nak tau kat ne?? sebelah mak aku.. uhuhu.. Mak tgh tido kat bawah..sebelah katil aku je.. hehe.. tak malu!! dah besar pun tido ngan mak... Tapi aku tgh darurat ni.. Aku pun sambungla tido kat sebelah mak... dengan mulut terkumat - kamit baca ayat kursi...Mase tu kul 4.15 pagi...

Nightmare Lagi!!! Makkk tolongggggg.....
Jeng Jeng... Tiba2 aku berada dlm satu rumah yg amat tak familiar... Rase cam Kondo dengan decoration yg cantik.. Serase aku plak.. dindingnya warna merah hati.. hehe.. ingat lagi tu!!! Agaknya sebab si fiza citer sket2 pasal home decor, aku jd terkenan umah lawa lak!! Pastu ader satu sudut umah tu.. Org tgh makan2.. Aderla dlm 6 org.. Aku tak kenal langsung saper mereka ni.. Yg aku tau, aku ngantuk, aku nak tido.. Aku pun tido la kat karpet.. sian aku.. tade katil kot! Ntah camne.. aku terdengar bunyi org ketuk pintu nak masuk.. Aku pun cari la port lain nak tido... Yg heran aku tu.. aku bole pilih tido bawah satu kabinet yg tade pintu... pelik!! Ok then aderla sorang tu tolong bukakkan pintu tu.. Pastu suasana jadi senyap jek..aku masih layan tido aku yg indah..and tiba2.. aku terasa diri ku masuk dlm satu guni.. tgn tu perlahan2 je masukkan aku bermula dari kepala.. bile dah sampai ke dada, aku cuba menarik diri ku dari dimasuki guni... Yang bestnye... bole plak dengar suara 'dia' menyanyi2 lagu melayu(suara lelaki).. slow n menyeramkan jugak la...Lagu cam ala2 citer korea yg penah aku tgk tu.. citer 'Wishing Stairs'.. Sedar2 aku rase cam dah ke scene lain bile aku bertembung ngan 'benda' tu....Pastu aku dah tak ingat ape blaku.. Yg aku tau.. aku terasa kena himpit ngan benda tu... tak leh gerak badan ngan mulut..Aku cuma bole baca ayat kursi dlm hati aku... Yg herannya aku bukan baca ayat kursi.. aku baca al-fatihah... Bile aku baca Malikiyau middin.. aku tiba2 bole bersuara n terjaga dari tidur... Mak aku jadi terbangun sebab dengar suara aku.. hehe.. ingat aku mengigau ke..

Aku pun citer la kat mak aper yg berlaku sepanjang mlm... uhuhu... dah la ngantuk.. kena kaco ngan 'benda' tu plak.. Pastu mak aku teringat something yg dia penah dengar bunyi ketuk pintu kat depan umah sblum tu.. Eh? aku pun dengar!!! Alamak.. memang 'benda' tu nak lawat aku balik kot.. Mak aku ckp dia memang dengar org ketuk pintu 3 kali.. pastu dia pandang aku tgh baca suratkabo.. tader reaction ke budak ni? Agaknya dia tak dengar tu.. Then mak aku ignore jela pasal tu... Baru ari ni aku sedar pasal ketuk pintu tu.. Bile ingat balik mase aku dok kat tepi pintu tu.. meremang bulu roma aku... uhuhuhu... 'Nape ko kaco aku hah?'

:: The Journey ::

This is the situation in the train - on the way to office...

Standing up in the LRT train with crowded people..
with the purfumes arousing me..
Watching people either sitting or standing,
Some holding a book in hand, concetrating reading..
The faces looks fresh.. with the make up still..
Dressing looks neat.. matching the personal as working person....
Everyone looks stranger for each other.. even though there are certain day, the faces are same..
Yeah.. they prefer to be like 'Mind-ur-own-business' thinking..
just looking around.. looking their surrounding..
Waiting to be dropped off...
Meanwhile, no other sound except the train machine roaring..

Sigh... the journey has not ended yet..Wait until i go back from the office...
The environment is almost the same..
crowded people but not too pack.. still hav a space to breath.
But the breath is not too nice to smell... the smell from original deodarant made by varieties of human.. yucks...
it goes strongly through my nose....gosh.. feel dizzy..
Feel impatient to reach home..
As the door train opens.. i step out to continue my journey to bus station..
Waiting for someone to fetch me.. to bring me home..

And the journey continues for the next day.. next day... next day...
In 5 times a week....

:: BeiNg UnCoNsCioUs ::

I hav no idea about myself now.. kind of weird when i dunno myself and where i'm heading to.. clueless....? blur...? dull...? unwell...? unmotivated..? lose some of brain cell ?(especially logic side..)

Anyway... a new boss is coming to the town... hahaha.. Well no more uncle Mel in the list.. he's leaving, probably to other company which offer him a much higher salary, I guess itz a normal reason people go out and in here bcoz of money... money and money.. But what if there any leaving reason that staff here would not know especially newbie like me.. Everytime people move out from this company..it keep questioning me 'why are they leaving.?' 'Are the salary not quite high for them?' or mayb a question like 'Are the job give them a depression thought..? ' or some sort that give them a bad impression on this company.. So far, my works doesn't give me a bad headache.. Perhaps in the low level of tension..Maybe someday i hav to face the big depression job, i guess..huh! Who knows when the people will experiences the high pressure in their job life.. Sigh..

Yesterday, as usual, i spent some of my time toward games.. Hee.. i know, itz kind of against the company policy but..i really need a break! i want to... i have to... hehe.. Am i look like a desperate to having a break from work while others could spend time on surfing without job assignment...? yeahh... i am.. Anyhow, my friend (in the middle of game with her neighbour) got caught by the boss.. guess who?? a new boss.. hehe..Never realized that new boss already show some of his 'strict character' to us... Well he's still a new for us.. Not my intention to talk about bad things behind my boss.. I think for now he's doin fine with his job.. Hopefully la..

Today task... jeng jeng.. is reading other blogs.. play games? haha..not advisable k... maybe i'll stick to concetrate on people scretch on their blog and do some ABAP stuff.. wokey.. itz 10.30am.. time to start my day.. chalo..

:: Conventional wisdom for programmers ::

First Law of Debugging:
It ain't what you don't know that hurts you. It's what you do know that just ain't so. In other words, when you're sure of everything but your program still doesn't work, one of the things you're sure of is wrong.

Second Law of Debugging:
Testing can only show the presence of bugs. It says nothing about their absence.
Debug the code - not the comments.

First Rule of Program Development:
A program that does only 80% of the job but works is better than one that does 100% but doesn't work.

Second Rule of Program Development:
The first 80% of a program takes 80% of development time. The last 20% of development takes the other 80% of time. The sooner you start to code, the longer the program will take to finish.

Law of Least Astonishment:
The most obvious interpretation should be correct.

KISS:
Keep it simple, stupid.

Crayons are more useful than keyboards for understanding pointers - draw pictures before you code.
First make it work. Then you can worry about making it fast.

Brooks' Law:
Adding manpower to a late software project only makes it later.

Law of Conservation of Program Size:
If you make your code shorter, make your comments longer.
The user is part of every system. When the user fails, the system has failed.

Today's Programmer Humour:
Once a programmer drowned in the sea. Many Marines where at that time on the beach, but the programmer was shouting "F1 F1" and nobody understood it...

p/s: today my heart feeling unwell... i dunno how to illustrate the feeling.... Uhuhu....
Anyway....anyhow... enjoy the info pasted from internet.. Itz about programmer stuff!

:: SleePy MoNdaY ::

Today is another boring day ... and sleepy day for me... but relaxing from work.. hahaha... Life is beautiful only when i'm in no task to do.. but once i got d job given.... i'm dead.. hehehe... abis laa...

Anyway.. i hav a very tired weekend with full of agenda attended.. Let start with Saturday.. Sat Morning, i woke up late and as usual, help my mother by did a simple chores.. Later in d afternoon, i went to my auntie's house.. Having a kenduri syukur there.. When the night reached , we attended the engagament ceremony at my cousin fiancee.. We went by almost 16 cars to the house.. and itz only takes 10 -15 minutes to arrive..(kind of a grand style to bring 15x4 people along...feel like attending a wedding ceremony but itz not) Not mentioned with the ceremony decoration.. the food..the fiancee...Yeah a gal wore a very pretty dress, suits with her figure and looks...no wonder my cousin wants her so badly... Hopefully my cousin could watch her appearance that nite but itz possible.. By that time, he was in UK.. for study purpose..Anyway the food was tremendous.. i ate kind of a lot... hee. We reached home almost 1am... Huaarghhh... feel tired..Not bcoz of the ceremony.. but the jam.. i hate it!! Stuck at Bandar Kinrara almost half an hour.. what on earth was happening there.. huh! then, when we passed over the road to IOI Mall.. the highway was smooth.. Then i saw some police just ended their Road Block operation.. haiyoo... thatz why we reached home very late..

Tomorrow.. another agenda was waiting for me... my friend is getting married on that day.. But Akad Nikah ceremony was held yesterday (possible for me to attend while i was in Bangi ) The house not very far from my house.. but still.. the sun was so hot.. i can't barely walk with my Baju Kebaya and high heel shoes... So my father's fren fetch me... When we reached there, everyone was already served the food.. Then.. we headed to the bride bedroom.. to meet her.. but unfortunately her sister insist us to not get into that room while she was preparing her costume.. Hmm.. we ate our lunch first.. The time was arrived when the bridegroom was in the ceremony area and i looked my fren was very nervous to met him..Hmm without further story, eventually, they are officially called husband n wife...They look matching for each other.. Very lovely couple.. Hee.. i wish i could be in her place.... haha.. just my imaginary.. My story isn't finish k.. After that, my fren (who
went along to my wedding ceremony) and i went to KL... just lepak around.. hehe... do watever can do as long as title 'single' is stick to me... but 'commitment' can't be resist ok? Huha here...huha there.. Finally... i reached home almost 9.00 pm... such a tired weekend i had.. but itz worth!! Ya lor... watched my relative and fren is having good time in their future life... their happiness are also my happiness.. am i rite?

By the way, i picked some interesting stuff from internet... the words looks meaningful.. itz from Mother Teresa sentences..

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.
If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies; Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.
--Mother Teresa

p/s: i'm so so damn sleepy.... i even can't understand wat i wrote.. hehe....the words are jumbling everywhere... plez ignore if u don't understand k..

:: Emotionally curbed ::

I thought when i stepped into the house that nite.. as usual my mum wouldn’t say anything.. but then.... oppss.. a special lecture just for me.. and my mouth couldn’t opposed to every single words she said.. yeah.. itz my fault.. just admit it!

Well.. living with family is not easy as staying outside..Means far from parents attention... but that doesn’t mean i don’t like to stay with them.. i luv them so much.. they are very supportive and truly care about me..Itz not their fault of not letting me to go back late.. Itz bcoz of my young blood who always wanted a freedom world... Compare to other frens, i feel very lucky bcoz i hav opportunity to see my parents everyday and i have their help to cook for me..hee.. and some other things that i couldn’t do by myself.. hehe.. how lucky i am...

Hmm.. yeah.. but my heart can’t escape to do some mischievous thing.. But usually in the end.. i explain to them what naughty stuff i did... hahaha... and then, a special lecture was dedicated to me... Yeah..I can’t lie to them if i done sumthing wrong..

Actually i don’t want to make my blog become personal...but i think some people might hav the same thought with me.. so ..itz not big deal for me to let reader knows what i felt.. but lately.. i think.. my words become easily to exploite... by me of coz!! hehe.. bcoz i get used to write a diary.. So sometimes... i write it almost like a diary but trying not to break people's heart.. Ok back to my topic.. ‘terkongkong’ sometimes good for me but not too tight.. i can be a crazy person if i stay at home for one week without say ‘hi’ to sunshine...hehe.. feel like a prisoner.. But hmm...i realize something different situation happened when i started my job... my parents slowly loose their attention towards me..weird huh? Mayb bcoz i’m going to be a real adult person (suppose i am..) hopefully laa.... Or mayb my maturity is grown up and they show me their thrust that i can differentiate between good and ‘evil’ part... hope so...

Well after all... they are my parents.. yup!

:: FuTuRe TaLKs ::

I look myself in the mirror..‘You’re getting older.. u realize it or not??’ erk.. that mirror is talking to me???? Oh no... it is another-side-of-me which remind me that... i’m almost in quater of century...or have been living in the earth for 2 and a half decades... it is a long journey from the baby i was born until the person i become now.. but still... this is actually the beginning of life... This is when female + male = family.. Talking about family.. am i hav the good package to go through this stage? Frankly.. i’m not!!! But most of the people in the age like mine..are eager to make family.. But.. why i don’t hav that feeling? Next week.. my fren is getting married and she looks very happy beside her future-husband.. I can feel they are well prepared to be a husband n wife.. What a lovely couple to be with...

Hmm..the marriage concept for me is when they gives a full commitment between both side... not only commitment ok? Itz more than that., itz about GIVE n TAKE.. It is how the partner show their respectiveness, responsibilities, n happiness towards their partner.. In other way, do concern about ur partner as when u think about urself... It is true nowadays, equality between female n male can’t be deny... and it is reflecting the marriage perspectives towards responsibilities between husband n wife.. Wife doing chores and office job but of coz with the help of husband do on laundry side even though they are attached on working life... n thatz wat i meant by – ‘fair n square’. But i guess not all the man like to be timid by women-power.. it depends on their compromise of how they look n make their family life meaningful...

For now.. i’m looking forward to learn and experience to be a good future-wife.. but i guess... time hasn’t come for me to get into that reality.... InsyaAllah.... just wait n see.... hahaha.. belum seru lagi tuuu.....

:: Finding 'me' inside myself ::

I'm totally lost.. Time has changed so fast that i cannot define the suitable 'me' of myself.. I feeling like i'm losing hope of being myself now.. i hate it when i'm not in a comfortable n proper mood...having no desire on job make me more 'undefined'.. Goshhhhh.... i really.. really HATE it so much... uhuhuhu....

:: FoOLisH ThiNG I DiD ::

This is the day when sumbody get fool by sumbody.... and when sumbody get mad by sumbody (who actually laughed to that sumbody who has been fooled)... mmm my sentences looks confusing.. but haha.. itz April Fool day ok!! And i’m the luckiest one who can’t escaped from being dummy.. isn’t it ashamed...? uhuhu... This happen to me when shannon... which is the ‘next-desk gal’ sent me an address of this one ‘cool’ website (which is my biggest mistake to trust her...)..Well i went to that website n itz surprised that the airline company offer me a free ticket and.... as i remembered... this opportunity open to only the first 200 who grab it! .. I ask her again.. “r u sure this is true”.. She said.. she already registered, n in order to get that free ticket, i must register all my details to them.. Without any doubt, i fill up the register form..one by one.. with full confidence that i will get the free ticket...

I never thought that sumthing embarrasing will happen to me.. until.. i click submit button.. n there it shows... APRIL FOOL!!! Hahahaha.i heard my frens give a big laughed to me.. n not only that!! My name appeared to be one of the foolish person in the list... Eeee.... so teruk!!! Well itz an April Fool Day.. can’t mad to them... When i flash memory back to where i filled up that stupid form.. How foolish i am to be that stupid person who believe in free airline ticket.. Goshh!! I guess i’m not d only one who get embarrased by this..After i made up my mind to pass this ‘april fool thing’ to sumbody... hahaha n they get fooled by me too.. hahaha...Isn't it life great ... :)